VOL. I · NO. 8588SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 5, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
ADVERTISEMENT
WORLD ABSURDITY:

Military recruiter runs over toddler, flees scene in Odesa Oblast

Filed 2h ago · Via NV · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
At Rest
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: Roy Egloff · CC BY-SA 4.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

A driver working for a district military recruitment center struck a 2-year-old boy with his car in a village in Odesa Oblast's Balta municipality while delivering draft notices, then left the scene, according to regional police. The child had stepped away from his father and suffered bodily injuries requiring hospitalization.

Investigators have opened criminal proceedings against the driver under road-safety and abandonment statutes, and police say the driver is to be detained while the full circumstances of the crash are established.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

Source: Read the original at NV → Scored: At Rest · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire