VOL. I · NO. 8578WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 26, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
WHITE HOUSE ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY: 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

JD Vance tells supporters to skip donating: 'Groceries cost what they cost'

Filed 6h ago · Via Newsweek · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Mister Exposition
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: BenAveling · CC BY-SA 3.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

A fundraising text sent under JD Vance's name told a recipient not to donate if she couldn't afford it, adding 'Groceries cost what they cost,' before linking to an RNC donation page with a preselected $47 contribution. Vance's personal involvement in writing or approving the message is unclear. The DNC seized on the line, accusing the administration of ignoring the affordability squeeze it's presiding over.

Official data undercuts the folksy shrug: food-at-home prices rose 2.7 percent over the year, beef climbed 9.4 percent, and polling shows 70 percent of Americans disapprove of Trump's handling of living costs, with cost-of-living now the top midterm issue for nearly half of voters. Democrats currently hold an eight-point edge on the issue heading toward November, when the full House and 35 Senate seats are on the line.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
There is a special genre of political writing in which the fundraiser acknowledges your suffering, gestures sympathetically at it, and then presents a preselected dollar amount anyway — a kind of empathy that always ends with a payment field. Somewhere a consultant workshopped “groceries cost what they cost” and decided it was warmth rather than a shrug, which tells you everything about who is reading the room and who is reading the donor list. The affordability crisis, it turns out, is a fundraising vertical.
Source: Read the original at Newsweek → Scored: Mister Exposition · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
ADVERTISEMENT
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire