VOL. I · NO. 8620WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 7, 20265¢
The Daily Buffoon
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WHITE HOUSE ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY:

Trump Accounts Put 70 Million Kids on the Path to Financial Freedom

Filed 6h ago · Via White House · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Royal Banana
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: White House (Pete Souza) / Maison Blanche (Pete Souza) · Public domain · via Wikimedia Commons

The White House announced that nearly 70 million Trump Accounts have been created for American children under 18, with more than 60 million generated through automatic enrollment under the Working Families Tax Cuts law. Parents must still claim the accounts through an app to access them. Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent, IRS head Frank Bisignano, and private donors including Michael and Susan Dell and Brad Gerstner joined the celebration.

President Trump called it a step toward ensuring every child has a fair shot at the American Dream, crediting the Big Beautiful Bill that Republicans passed and every Democrat opposed. The release does not say how much money sits in a typical account, what it will be worth by the time any child turns 18, or how many parents have actually claimed one.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
Opening a jar with a kid's name on it is not the same as putting money in the jar. Seventy million accounts sounds grand until you notice the White House can't say what's in a typical one or how many parents have even claimed theirs through the app. Come back in eighteen years with a balance and we'll hold the parade then.
Source: Read the original at White House → Scored: Royal Banana · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
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