VOL. I · NO. 8591TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 8, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
ADVERTISEMENT
WORLD ABSURDITY:

Russian drone attack sparks office fire in Kyiv district

Filed 10h ago · Via NV · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Amazing Grace 2011
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: Number 10 · CC BY 2.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

Russian forces attacked Kyiv overnight with ballistic and cruise missiles, followed by a continued drone assault into the morning, according to Ukrainian officials. Debris and fires were reported at 16 locations across five districts, killing at least two people and injuring 12 more, with a supermarket, equipment warehouse, and auto parts store destroyed in the Solomyanskyi district.

A fire also broke out at an office building in Solomyanskyi and a warehouse in Shevchenkivskyi from drone debris, while a building in Podilskyi was damaged without catching fire. Ukraine's Air Force said it shot down two ballistic missiles and nearly all the cruise missiles, with Kyiv and Odesa oblasts as the main targets.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

Source: Read the original at NV → Scored: Amazing Grace 2011 · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire