VOL. I · NO. 8611MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 28, 20265¢
The Daily Buffoon
ADVERTISEMENT
WORLD ABSURDITY:

Ukraine had fewer profitable agribusinesses even before port blockade — who still leads?

Filed 1h ago · Via NV · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Fox Tale Waltz Part 1 Instrumental
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: Thomas Cecil · Public domain · via Wikimedia Commons

Ukraine counted 82,954 registered agricultural companies as of September 2026, with more new firms registering than closing this year, according to Opendatabot data. But among the roughly 5,400 companies whose results could be compared across periods, the share turning a profit fell 8% even as combined revenue rose 19%, and total net profit dropped 19% to UAH 66.1 billion.

Vinnytsia Poultry Farm led the pack by revenue, growing nearly 40% year over year, followed by Myronivka Poultry Farm and Lebedyn Seed Plant. The report notes earlier warnings that Ukraine could lose 12 million metric tons of grain production in 2027 due to reduced planted acreage tied to seaport blockades and export constraints.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

Source: Read the original at NV → Scored: Fox Tale Waltz Part 1 Instrumental · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
OR FOLLOW THE DESK ON BLUESKY →
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire · Bluesky