VOL. I · NO. 8573FRIDAY, AUGUST 21, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
COURTS ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY: 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Three Colorado River states agree to massive water cuts

Filed 5d ago · Via Courthouse News · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Sergio's Magic Dustbin
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: David E. Lucas · Public domain · via Wikimedia Commons

The federal Interior Department issued final two-year operating guidelines cutting Colorado River water to California, Arizona and Nevada by a combined 1.25 million acre-feet annually — California losing 440,000, Arizona 760,000, and Nevada 50,000. The three states will also store at least 700,000 acre-feet between 2027 and 2028, under a plan stepping in after seven basin states failed to reach a voluntary agreement by an October 1 deadline.

Officials cited historically low water levels at Lake Powell and Lake Mead, both at their lowest since 1963, driven by a changing climate. California's water commissioner JB Hamby called the cuts an extraordinary commitment but also framed them as merely a bridge, insisting all seven basin states — not just the three that agreed — need to share the burden going forward.

Interior Secretary Doug Burgum thanked the seven states, thirty tribes, Mexico and other stakeholders for their input, noting 40 million people and millions of acres of farmland depend on the river. The guidelines create a decade-long framework for future decisions, with two years built in for states to further negotiate among themselves.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
Everyone involved is praising an agreement that only three of seven states actually reached voluntarily, which is the diplomatic equivalent of throwing a party and calling the guests who showed up 'extraordinary.' The people managing a river at 1963-era water levels are still talking about future negotiation windows, which suggests urgency here is a relative concept.
Source: Read the original at Courthouse News → Scored: Sergio's Magic Dustbin · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
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