VOL. I · NO. 8598TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 15, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
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WORLD ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY:

Ukrainian court lets former presidential chief of staff Andriy Yermak remove his ankle monitor after a specialist warns it could ‘threaten his health’

Filed 2h ago · Via Meduza · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Sneaky Adventure
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: European Parliament · CC BY 2.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

Ukraine's High Anti-Corruption Court lifted the ankle-monitor requirement for Andriy Yermak, former head of the Presidential Office, citing an unnamed independent medical specialist who warned the device could threaten his life and health. Yermak is suspected of laundering 460 million hryvnias, about $10 million, tied to a luxury development outside Kyiv.

The court extended other restrictions for 60 days: he must report address or job changes, surrender travel passports, and stay within designated localities. He was briefly held in pretrial detention before posting bail of more than $3 million.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
An ankle monitor that turns out to be medically dangerous only after the wearer is a well-connected former official is the kind of coincidence that makes a person want to see the medical file. Nobody is saying the specialist is wrong, only that the timing has a familiar shape, like a neighbor's bad back that flares up right when it's his turn to help move furniture. The passport stayed in the drawer, at least, so somebody on that court is still paying attention.
Source: Read the original at Meduza → Scored: Sneaky Adventure · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
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