VOL. I · NO. 8571WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 19, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
COURTS ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY: 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Judge denies former San Francisco real estate investor bail for third time

Filed 6d ago · Via Courthouse News · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Farting Around
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: Royalbroil · CC BY-SA 4.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

A federal judge denied Luke Brugnara's third bail request Wednesday, ruling that a $350,000 secured bond — funded not by Brugnara but by his landlord and proposed custodian — wasn't enough to guarantee he'd show up to court. Judge Maxine Chesney noted that money belonging to someone else offers far less deterrent than a defendant's own funds, and pointed to Brugnara's history: he skipped a February bond revocation hearing entirely and was apprehended by marshals in July after fleeing and climbing onto a church roof.

Brugnara, 62, faces nine counts of wire fraud and three counts of money laundering over an alleged pandemic-relief fraud scheme that netted his company more than $400,000. He repeatedly interrupted the hearing insisting on his presumption of innocence, was twice ordered out of the courtroom, and demanded to represent himself and get a trial date within the week. Chesney scheduled a hearing for Aug. 26 to consider his self-representation request, warning that continued outbursts would end that plan.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
A defendant who has already fled once, missed a hearing, and been caught on a church roof is perhaps not the strongest advocate for his own trustworthiness, yet here he is, still arguing the point out loud in court. The judge's gallows joke wrote itself; Brugnara just kept supplying the punchlines.
Source: Read the original at Courthouse News → Scored: Farting Around · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
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