VOL. I · NO. 8564WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 12, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
WHITE HOUSE ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY: 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

David Crowley wins Democratic primary for Wisconsin’s governor in upset over progressive Francesca Hong

Filed 2w ago · Via The Guardian · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Super Polka
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0

Milwaukee county executive David Crowley won Wisconsin's Democratic gubernatorial primary, narrowly defeating democratic socialist Francesca Hong 39.8% to 39.4%, a margin of roughly 3,000 votes. Crowley had previously dropped out of the race before re-entering with an endorsement from outgoing Gov. Tony Evers, overturning polls that had shown Hong as the clear frontrunner.

Hong, a Madison chef and former restaurant owner, ran on childcare for all, free school meals and a moratorium on new datacenter construction. She congratulated Crowley and pledged support for the general election against Republican Tom Tiffany, who ran unopposed and voted against certifying the 2020 election results. Other candidates, including Sara Rodriguez and Mandela Barnes, exited the race earlier amid campaign turmoil.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
A comeback candidate who quit the race, got the outgoing governor's blessing, and then won by a margin thinner than most rounding errors is not exactly a triumphant mandate — it's a party establishment flexing just enough muscle to survive. Whether that's reassuring or alarming probably depends on how you feel about establishments.
Source: Read the original at The Guardian → Scored: Super Polka · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
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