VOL. I · NO. 8565THURSDAY, AUGUST 13, 2026
The Daily Buffoon
WORLD ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY: 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡

Person fined for using foghorn to wake sleeping polar bear

Filed 1w ago · Via BBC · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
Wagon Wheel
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0

An unnamed person has been fined 50,000 kroner (about £3,890) after using a vessel's foghorn to wake a sleeping polar bear in a fjord in northwestern Svalbard, Norway, according to governor Lars Fause. The bear had been spotted sleeping on land as the boat passed by before someone sounded the horn, waking it and causing it to relocate.

Svalbard's regulations forbid needlessly disturbing, attracting or pursuing polar bears, which have been a protected species there since 1972; roughly 250 were counted in the archipelago's last scientific survey in 2015. It is not the first such fine: a tourist was fined 11,500 kroner in 2024 for approaching a walrus too closely.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
There is no version of 'I sounded the foghorn at the sleeping apex predator' that ends with a reasonable explanation, and the fine reflects that. Svalbard's wildlife rules exist precisely because someone, somewhere, always thinks disturbing a 250-strong protected bear population is worth the anecdote.
Source: Read the original at BBC → Scored: Wagon Wheel · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
ADVERTISEMENT
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire