VOL. I · NO. 8627WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 14, 20265¢
The Daily Buffoon
ADVERTISEMENT
WHITE HOUSE ✒ EDITORIAL ABSURDITY:

Social Security benefits increase will hit 3.6% in 2027

Filed 47m ago · Via Michigan Advance · The Buffoon Desk
THIS STORY IS SCORED
As I Figure
Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0
Photo: Heather Carreiro · CC BY-SA 4.0 · via Wikimedia Commons

The Social Security Administration announced a 3.6% cost-of-living adjustment for 72 million beneficiaries starting in January 2027, with SSI recipients seeing the bump from December 31. The agency says average retirement benefits will rise about $75 a month, while the payroll tax cap climbs from $184,500 to $192,300.

The adjustment is calculated from Consumer Price Index data spanning the third quarter of 2025 through the third quarter of 2026. Tax rates funding the program stay essentially flat at 6.2%.

Social Security's payments are outpacing its tax collections, and without congressional action, benefits are set to automatically shrink starting in 2032. Senate candidates whose six-year terms would place them in office when that cliff hits have largely avoided discussing it.

The full dispatch is available from the source below.

✒ FROM THE EDITORIAL DESK
A $75 raise sounds nice until you remember the house is scheduled to run out of money while some of these same candidates are still collecting their own salaries. Nobody running for a six-year term wants to be the one who tells voters the math doesn't work, so they just don't mention it, the way you'd avoid bringing up a leaky roof while showing a house. The silence isn't an accident, it's a strategy, and it works right up until 2032 arrives anyway.
Source: Read the original at Michigan Advance → Scored: As I Figure · Kevin MacLeod · CC BY 4.0
MORE FROM THE DESK
WHITE HOUSE How to talk about AIPAC without fueling antisemitism · via Michigan Advance
OP-ED Honey, Please · via The Daily Buffoon
THE EDITION OF WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 14, 2026 → · THE ARCHIVE
Read it scored.
Every story, every clown, every kazoo — in your pocket. Music plays automatically. Regret is optional.
GET IT ON iOS GET IT ON ANDROID
OR FOLLOW THE DESK ON BLUESKY →
© 2026 The Daily Buffoon · Satire, scored. Archive · Privacy · Support · Music credits · On satire · Bluesky