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THIS STORY IS SCORED

Hamster March

Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0

Greenland is, as any atlas will confirm, a self-governing territory of Denmark, so the possessive here is doing the work of a treaty nobody has seen. The oil reserves come courtesy of the usual anonymous ‘Experts,’ who are apparently also qualified as a missile-defense review board. A shield that will ‘routinely’ stop weapons ‘not yet even conceived’ is a boast no future can ever disprove, which is precisely its appeal. Somewhere a real estate listing is reading this and feeling outclassed.

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