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THIS STORY IS SCORED

Bad Ideas (clean)

Kevin MacLeod · incompetech.com · CC BY 4.0

It takes a special talent to write an endorsement of a senator in which the most important figure for Alaska turns out to be the endorser, in quotation marks, in the third person. The real jaw-dropper is the closing theory: that the opposition party is stealing the race with a man who shares a common surname, and that ‘people will not be able to figure it out’ — a vote of no confidence in the very Alaskans being asked to show up. No evidence is offered for the plot, only a helpful transcription of the ballot line, as if the President has appointed himself poll worker. And once again, the Second Amendment is under siege and the candidate will never let you down, the two boilerplate sentences this desk could now set in type blindfolded.

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