VOL. I · NO. 8618MONDAY, OCTOBER 5, 20265¢

THE EDITION

Monday, October 5, 2026

120 stories filed by the Buffoon Desk.

CULTURE My Hair Was 'Chock-Full Of Split Ends' — Until These Products Reversed The Damage · via HuffPost

WORLD Grain under blockade: What is preventing Ukraine from expanding exports via the Danube · via NV

WHITE HOUSE Karoline Leavitt Is Joining Fox News In A New Role · via HuffPost

WORLD U.S. Navy tests maritime surveillance drone capable of flying at an altitude of 12 kilometers · via NV

CULTURE Apple AirPods 4 Are Under $80 At Walmart Right Now — But Not For Long · via HuffPost

WORLD Russian forces strike Palanca checkpoint on Moldovan border: Munition hits bus, border officer wounded · via NV

WORLD Indonesia threatens prison time for unauthorized downloads of forest data · via Mongabay

WHITE HOUSE Presidential Message on Fire Prevention Week · via White House

WHITE HOUSE Presidential Message on Child Health Day · via White House

WHITE HOUSE Supporters of Barrett, Lawrence clash at dueling protests ahead of debate · via Michigan Advance

WHITE HOUSE Trump Just Confused This Massive Country With... Huh??? · via HuffPost

WORLD Estonia shifts troops toward Russian border, buys missiles that can hit St. Petersburg — FT · via NV

TARIFFS Is Inflation Making Restaurants Cheaper Than Groceries? Here’s What The Burrito Test Says · via Forbes

WHITE HOUSE Emergency Tax Relief on Diesel Fuel · via White House

WORLD Macron’s decade leaves France ‘Europe’s weakest link,’ Bloomberg reports · via NV

CULTURE My Heels Were So Cracked It Was Painful To Walk — Until I Found This $10 Balm · via HuffPost

WORLD Tu-95 bomber crash killed eight Russian airmen, including officers — report · via NV

CULTURE This Common Men’s Bathroom Habit Has People Puzzled. We Found Out What It’s REALLY About. · via HuffPost

WORLD U.S. energy secretary on whether Trump is ready to impose 'hellish sanctions' on Russia · via NV

CULTURE The Surprising Origin Of 'Uppercase' And 'Lowercase' Is Hiding In Plain Sight · via HuffPost

WHITE HOUSE President Trump Takes Decisive Action to Lower Diesel Costs for American Truckers, Farmers · via White House

WORLD Trump targets Venezuela for another mineral resource after oil · via NV

WHITE HOUSE New Supreme Court Term Begins With Cases On Immigration, Religious Rights And More · via HuffPost

COURTS 10th Circuit says court should not have blocked Utah psychedelic mushroom prosecution · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Final ‘grandmother’ cottonwood toppled in Lochiel to clear a path for a new border wall · via Arizona Mirror

WORLD Flydubai co-pilot planned to target Tel Aviv skyscraper or Ben-Gurion Airport — report · via NV

CULTURE John Oliver Has Cheeky Request For Trump’s Secret Service · via HuffPost

COURTS Judge scraps Trump challenge to in-state tuition for immigrant students in Virginia · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Byron Donalds unveils proposal to protect Florida waterways · via Florida Phoenix

COURTS Consumers file Hail Mary at SCOTUS to block Paramount-Warner merger · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Trump drops longtime aversion to mail-in voting with GOP trailing in polls · via Michigan Advance

WHITE HOUSE Uthmeier announces arrests in alleged massive sea life poaching ring · via Florida Phoenix

WORLD Sabine Schoppe who built a refuge for Palawan’s forest turtles has died · via Mongabay

COURTS Abuse claims against Catholic Church limited by 1986 California ballot measure · via Courthouse News

CULTURE Optogenetics wins the Nobel – one neuroscience breakthrough in a line of technological innovations helping scientists map and control the brain · via The Conversation

COURTS DC Circuit grills EPA over reclassification of toxic chemical emission standard · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Autism-treatment task force inches closer to finalizing recommendations · via Florida Phoenix

WORLD Brazil far-right presidential candidate wins most votes in deforestation hotspots · via Mongabay

COURTS Feds say California woman spied on son of Taiwanese president for China · via Courthouse News

COURTS Roblox ducks lawsuit for ignoring artist’s ‘NoAI’ tag · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Uthmeier sticks by his guns: Hope Florida transfers were ‘entirely legal, absolutely’ · via Florida Phoenix

COURTS Fifth Circuit wrestles with constitutionality of warrantless Flock searches · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE US House Dems’ campaign chief predicts they’ll gain majority control in midterms · via Florida Phoenix

COURTS Ninth Circuit temporarily pauses reinstatement of fired Seattle US attorney · via Courthouse News

COURTS Quebec seeks to appeal mandatory English documentation for voters · via Courthouse News

COURTS Expedia hit with antitrust class action over algorithm pricing scheme · via Courthouse News

COURTS Supreme Court showdown leaves future of climate lawsuits up in the air · via Courthouse News

WORLD Russia has brought its first known treason case based on tax payments to Ukraine · via Meduza

COURTS Euro slides as worries about French debt grow · via Courthouse News

COURTS Amazon asks Minnesota justices to extinguish $4 million battery fire suit · via Courthouse News

COURTS Intense heat puts births in jeopardy, UN tells Fiji talks · via Courthouse News

COURTS Irish organized crime case paused as Kinahan scouts lawyer · via Courthouse News

COURTS India court seeks explanations from election body in voter list row · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE State regulators to allow part of NextEra’s political past to be examined in Dominion merger case · via Florida Phoenix

WORLD Uncertainty mounts as Suriname struggles to evict illegal settlers in the Amazon · via Mongabay

COURTS At First Circuit, Trump admin disputes judge’s authority to restore research funding to Harvard · via Courthouse News

FACT CHECK Trump Touts Medicaid Drug Savings, But Details Remain Murky · via FactCheck.org

WORLD India is one of Russia’s biggest energy buyers. Can it also help broker peace with Ukraine? · via Meduza

COURTS Spain’s Sánchez calls early elections, setting up showdown with the right · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Progressive PAC launches $1M campaign against ‘deceptive’ GOP-backed ballot propositions · via Arizona Mirror

WHITE HOUSE For U-M pro-Palestinian protesters, consequences linger after charges were dropped · via Michigan Advance

COURTS Eighth Circuit rebuffs ‘cruel and unusual’ label for Missouri sex offender list · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE President Trump and Republicans Are Delivering Real Results for Nebraska · via White House

WORLD Sochi’s former mayor reportedly left to fight in Ukraine. Authorities brought him back, and a court has now sentenced him to 15 years for bribery. · via Meduza

COURTS Murder trial begins for Virginia man accused of dismembering wife · via Courthouse News

WORLD An activist challenged Russian officials after they blocked his protest against election fraud. Now he’s been jailed on drug charges and accused of ‘involvement in a Ukrainian armed group.’ · via Meduza

COURTS Supreme Court snubs Alabama jury impartiality case · via Courthouse News

WORLD Russian strikes leave Ukraine with almost no spare locomotives, further complicating grain exports · via Meduza

COURTS ICC hits more Taliban officials with arrest warrants over persecution of women · via Courthouse News

WORLD Ukraine’s path into the EU may come with a catch for its farmers: limits on subsidies and market access · via Meduza

WORLD Thailand braces for more rain as death toll from recent flooding hits 31 · via Mongabay

COURTS German spy chief warns ‘shadow war’ with Russia is escalating · via Courthouse News

COURTS UK insists terror-linked military base is safe as US withdraws bombers · via Courthouse News

COURTS Astronomers catch two stars consuming their orbiting companions · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE American businesses added just 29K new jobs in September as hiring slumps · via Arizona Mirror

WORLD Russia strikes Ukraine’s Kharkiv, killing three and injuring more than 30 · via Meduza

COURTS SCOTUS calls for redo on Washington state voting maps · via Courthouse News

COURTS Secrets · via Courthouse News

CULTURE Why can’t people regenerate limbs like salamanders? · via The Conversation

COURTS Elections leave Bosnia-Herzegovina mired in ethnic divisions, complicating EU path · via Courthouse News

CULTURE Whether it’s banning books or preventing Macklemore from touring, silencing artists often backfires · via The Conversation

WORLD Munition falls near Moldovan checkpoint on border with Ukraine, injures border guard · via Meduza

COURTS ‘Let’s Go Brandon’ sweatshirt ban won’t get Supreme Court airing · via Courthouse News

CULTURE We’ve tracked $80M of spending on almost 170 AI-generated political ads this year – it’s weird · via The Conversation

CULTURE 2026 midterms could be the end of Pennsylvania’s split legislature, with effects on affordability, election reform, marijuana and more · via The Conversation

CULTURE What 1,000 years of golden roses tell us about popes’ authority and influence, from Leo IX to Leo XIV · via The Conversation

CULTURE Why it’s more important than ever to jump-start entrepreneurial careers from the college classroom · via The Conversation

FACT CHECK Medicare Part D: Payments and Contracts Between Pharmacies and Plan Sponsors That Are Vertically Integrated · via GAO

CULTURE Fewer Americans are getting help buying groceries from SNAP benefits as states grapple with the program’s cascade of changes · via The Conversation

WHITE HOUSE Care and Costs: What can be done about the price of healthcare? · via Michigan Advance

FACT CHECK Concrete Masonry Promotion Program: Commerce Could Enhance Its Oversight Controls · via GAO

CULTURE US migrant flights to Liberia evoke troubling history of sending people deemed unwanted to the West African nation · via The Conversation

WHITE HOUSE Youth vote skews heavily to Democrats in Michigan, swing states, economic issues stay top concerns · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Ukraine touts gains from Operation Vivaldi as Russia claims major encirclements. What’s really happening on the battlefield? · via Meduza

WORLD ‘There could be local extinction’: The fight to protect Indonesia’s orangutans as El Niño fuels fires · via Mongabay

CULTURE Congress Members Move to Offset Coming Cuts to Rural Hospital Funding · via Daily Yonder

WORLD Two years after Hurricane Helene, survivors are taking lessons for the future · via Grist

WHITE HOUSE Infinite possibilities breed infinite concerns as Michigan voters weigh ‘Con-Con’ question · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Extreme heat left this student athlete on life support. He won’t be the last. · via Grist

WHITE HOUSE Kratom, 7-OH laws diverge amid the spread of potent synthetic products · via Stateline

WORLD Lukoil’s foreign asset sale becomes part of U.S.–Russia talks on ending Ukraine war, NYT reports · via Meduza

WORLD Russia deploys new Geran-4 drone with warhead built to hit bridges, power lines · via NV

WORLD Map shows countries hit by plague as Russian lab worker dies · via Newsweek

WORLD Rare Southern African succulent listed as critically endangered amid mining threat · via Mongabay

WORLD Tu-95MS bomber crashed in Russia, killing eight officers. Some helped organize missile strikes on Ukraine. · via Meduza

WORLD Ukraine downs 172 of 205 Russian drones and missiles, 13 sites struck · via NV

WORLD Kyiv starts installing turrets to defend against jet-powered drones · via Meduza

WORLD Oil prices fall as G7 reserve release adds to growing global supply · via NV

WORLD Car bomb in Russia destroys vehicle belonging to ex-prison official Ukraine accused of torturing POWs · via Meduza

WHITE HOUSE Michigan QB Bryce Underwood’s job may be at risk after Kyle Whittingham remarks · via Newsweek

WORLD More Latin American species are surfacing at a Bangkok wildlife market · via Mongabay

WORLD Everyone Got Pete Hegseth Wrong · via Foreign Policy

WORLD Weak prosecution leaves Southeast Asia’s tigers vulnerable to trafficking: Report · via Mongabay

WHITE HOUSE Is this what conservatism has come to? · via Florida Phoenix

WORLD Voters split over whether Burnham is any different to Starmer · via The Telegraph

WORLD Hunters reportedly kill hundreds of migratory birds stranded by thunderstorm in Malta · via Mongabay

WORLD Too young to run, old enough to protest: West Africa’s unfinished democratic bargain · via Global Voices

CULTURE This Is The Best Underwear I've Worn In My Entire Life · via HuffPost

WORLD The Good, Bad, and Dangerous in Hegseth’s Pentagon Overhaul · via Foreign Policy

CULTURE 56 Practical Things Worth Buying From Amazon's Early Fall Prime Day Deals · via HuffPost

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