VOL. I · NO. 8611MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 28, 20265¢

THE EDITION

Monday, September 28, 2026

124 stories filed by the Buffoon Desk.

WHITE HOUSE Trump Golf Comment Proves He Can't Keep Eye On Ball Of U.S. Priorities: Critics · via HuffPost

WORLD Russia hits business center in downtown Dnipro, killing 3, injuring 12 · via NV

WHITE HOUSE 87-Year-Old Woman’s Eviction From Home Of 70 Years Sparks Protests In Spain · via HuffPost

WORLD Winter evacuations from Kyiv would be a “last resort” measure — PM · via NV

CULTURE This Part Of A Man’s Wardrobe Is ‘Psychological Armor’ — And It Says A Lot About Him · via HuffPost

WORLD More than 250 Russian troops taken prisoner during Operation Vivaldi — photo · via NV

WORLD Jaco Muller turned his 15-year-old son’s idea into 197 rhino births · via Mongabay

WORLD Ukraine had fewer profitable agribusinesses even before port blockade — who still leads? · via NV

WORLD Defense Ministry reassesses Ukraine's real military needs for 2027 · via NV

WORLD US Homepage · via The Telegraph

WORLD Despite a drop in deforestation in 2025, forest losses pile up in the Mekong · via Mongabay

COURTS Judge allows evidence of domestic violence in trial of former Marine · via Courthouse News

WORLD Powerful nor’easter kills one, knocks out power to more than 110,000 — photo · via NV

CULTURE New Study Reveals What Happens When You Don't Get Enough REM Sleep … It’s Not Good · via HuffPost

WORLD Trump asked Xi Jinping if China wants to buy American weapons — U.S. ambassador · via NV

CULTURE Specialists Look At This 1 Body Part To See How Well You’re Aging · via HuffPost

WHITE HOUSE Major bill to set standards for college athletes’ pay on track to pass US Senate · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Fire breaks out at National Academy of Sciences in Kyiv after Russian drone attack — photos, video · via NV

WHITE HOUSE The Nolan Wells Verdict Is A Disgusting Reminder Of How Quickly And Frequently Our Justice Is Denied · via HuffPost

COURTS Chinese carmaker sues US Defense Department over lobbying rule · via Courthouse News

WORLD Ukrainian forces strike Russian Pantsir-S2, command posts and drone launch sites · via NV

WHITE HOUSE 'Impeachable Offense': Ex-Ethics Chief Shreds Trump's Ugly New 'Propaganda' Video · via HuffPost

WHITE HOUSE U.S. attorney tells AZ officials feds won’t back down on scouring voter data for noncitizens · via Arizona Mirror

WHITE HOUSE Trump used impossible foreign labor standards as tariff workaround, small businesses say · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Russian strike on logistics company in Synelnykove kills 1, teen among injured · via NV

WHITE HOUSE ‘The Bottom Fell Out’: Key Analyst Hits Republicans With Dire Election Warning · via HuffPost

WORLD More plastic, less glow? Pollution threatens deep sea’s bioluminescent life, experts warn · via Mongabay

COURTS Newsom signs legislation aimed at making Californians healthier · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Maricopa County investigated 60 suspected noncitizen voters. 52 are citizens, 8 are not. · via Arizona Mirror

COURTS Military drone maker can proceed with trade secret claims against ex-CTO · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE President Trump Calls on Congress to Save College Sports · via White House

WHITE HOUSE Opponents of Axon’s Scottsdale project take fight over voter rights to appeals court · via Arizona Mirror

WHITE HOUSE ‘Dumbfounds us all’: Congress struggles with policies rippling from AI development · via Florida Phoenix

WHITE HOUSE Trump thwarted in hunt for rare noncitizen voters as midterms near · via Stateline

COURTS New York prosecutors reopen investigation into Cornell gang rape claims · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Mined, Melted, and Poured in America: President Trump Reverses Years of Anti-Mining Policy · via White House

WORLD What happened to the Russians Putin mobilized four years ago? Meduza follows two of them — one still at the front, the other now a deserter in Spain. · via Meduza

COURTS Minnesota urges federal judge to toss challenges to trans athlete policies · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Nominations Sent to the Senate · via White House

WORLD Russia keeps attacking Ukrainian data centers, calling it a ‘mandatory digital detox’ · via Meduza

COURTS US deportations triggering ‘cascade’ of rights abuses: UN experts · via Courthouse News

COURTS UK releases five men arrested near US-operated air base amid terror probe · via Courthouse News

WORLD Reintroduced Grauer’s gorilla gives birth in DRC national park, ‘makes us happy’ · via Mongabay

COURTS Second Circuit questions ‘confusing’ immigrant licensing rule that led to DOT pulling $73 million in New York road funding · via Courthouse News

COURTS Justice Alito steps away from major climate dispute · via Courthouse News

WORLD Family in Russia’s Irkutsk region accuses police of plying a 54-year-old man with alcohol and forcing him to sign papers for military service in Ukraine · via Meduza

WORLD Russian street artist Slava Ptrk sums up four years abroad: ‘Unwanted There / Unwanted Here’ · via Meduza

WHITE HOUSE Michigan school districts, food pantries feel SNAP cut ripple effect ahead of cost shift to states · via Michigan Advance

COURTS Comedian convicted for Erdoğan ‘insult’ but freed pending appeal · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE How AI-powered bungling by Florida cops cost a father his freedom and $45,000 · via Florida Phoenix

WHITE HOUSE Trump administration revokes $810M approved by Congress for refugee aid and more · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Kremlin says enabling Starlink-equipped Ukrainian drones to strike deep inside Russia would be ‘reckless’ · via Meduza

COURTS Ethiopia pro-government forces say they take Tigray town · via Courthouse News

COURTS Indian-administered Kashmir assembly backs return to statehood · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Detroit and Flint teens struggle with mental health – and worried adults around them feel ‘helpless’ · via Michigan Advance

WORLD Sri Lanka’s disappearing snake charmers carry a legacy of fear and fascination · via Mongabay

COURTS Le Pen hails ‘victory’ after breakthrough in French Senate · via Courthouse News

WHITE HOUSE Northern Michigan lawmaker calls for stricter penalties on Lake Sturgeon poaching · via Michigan Advance

WHITE HOUSE Florida AG files to block ChatGPT development and place restrictions on OpenAI · via Florida Phoenix

WHITE HOUSE Governors pledge to oppose federal overreach — even when their party runs Washington · via Stateline

WORLD New deep-sea creatures unlocked! · via Mongabay

COURTS Federal bribery trial for DC Council member ends in mistrial · via Courthouse News

CULTURE Originalism: What it is, what it isn’t and why it’s the most democratic option for the Supreme Court · via The Conversation

WORLD When telcos shut down the internet, they shut down protests for the government · via Global Voices

WORLD Russian drone strike sets a building belonging to Ukraine’s National Academy of Sciences on fire in central Kyiv, killing at least two people · via Meduza

WORLD WSJ: Russia offers $20 million reward for capture of Ukrainian drone commander Robert ‘Magyar’ Brovdi · via Meduza

WORLD Rain eases in Bangkok but persistent flooding forces thousands to leave home · via Mongabay

COURTS Trump taps SCOTUS in bid to block gender-affirming care for transgender inmates · via Courthouse News

WORLD Russian general Alexander Lapin, dismissed from military service after setbacks in Ukraine, becomes Tatarstan deputy prime minister overseeing war-related affairs · via Meduza

WORLD As yellow-eyed penguins disappear, conservationists focus on deaths in fishing nets · via Mongabay

COURTS Top NATO commander says Russian hybrid campaign ‘isn’t working’ · via Courthouse News

WORLD South Korea demands an apology from Ukraine for disclosing the secret transfer of two North Korean prisoners · via Meduza

WHITE HOUSE GOP tax-cut bill means Medicaid payments to Arizona doctors and hospitals bill be slashed · via Arizona Mirror

WORLD Bloomberg: Hungary’s OTP Bank considers a full Russia exit as regulators review its purchase of Baltic lender Luminor · via Meduza

COURTS Irish border bomb case against law student delayed further · via Courthouse News

WORLD Brightline shows people want more trains. But who will pay for them? · via Grist

WORLD The mountain lion photo that helped change Los Angeles · via Mongabay

WORLD Bye-bye, Birdie: The Calypso King of the World dies at 91 · via Global Voices

FACT CHECK IT Systems Annual Assessment: DOD Should Improve IT Fraud Risk Management Practices · via GAO

FACT CHECK Nuclear Power: Actions Needed to Improve NRC’s Assessment of Its Workforce Needs · via GAO

FACT CHECK Nonimmigrant Visas: State Should Consistently Conduct Global Staffing Needs Assessments to Help Balance Workloads and Address Long Wait Times · via GAO

FACT CHECK Criminal Justice: Data on Noncitizen Incarcerations, Convictions, Removals, and Costs · via GAO

CULTURE Hibernating bacteria can invade hospitals and survive outer space – but their high energy bill is a weakness that scientists can strike · via The Conversation

FACT CHECK Cybersecurity Regulations: Industry Panelists Identify Duplication and Conflicts and Ways to Address Them · via GAO

CULTURE From lab to life: Why translating AI advances to the real world is a major challenge · via The Conversation

FACT CHECK Firearms Trafficking to Mexico: Better Data and Performance Monitoring Would Help Agencies Direct Resources to Counter Cartels · via GAO

WORLD Preserving wildlife DNA for the future: Interview with the Frozen Zoo’s Katie Heineman · via Mongabay

COURTS Real or Onion? · via Courthouse News

CULTURE College rankings, like those of US News and World Report, remain influential, despite their many flaws and decades of criticism · via The Conversation

CULTURE What was the original first-person shooter? Two largely forgotten computer games from the 1970s ushered in the genre · via The Conversation

CULTURE Menopause is a major health milestone, yet health records barely track it - new research · via The Conversation

CULTURE Generous paternal leave policies improve maternal and newborn health, family finances and workplace equality · via The Conversation

CULTURE Are there toxic chemicals in your grocery store receipt? · via The Conversation

WORLD Indonesia passes agrarian reform law amid concerns over land protections · via Mongabay

CULTURE Why fuel prices may go higher still · via The Conversation

WORLD Philippines is the deadliest country in Asia for environmental defenders, report finds · via Mongabay

WHITE HOUSE Michigan is burning. Here’s what the next governor can do to extinguish the blaze. · via Michigan Advance

WORLD As Australia’s kangaroo numbers rise, record cull renews calls for other control methods · via Mongabay

WHITE HOUSE Push for schools to guide safe firearm storage, only half complying a month from annual deadline · via Michigan Advance

CULTURE Commentary: Data Centers Aren’t the Only Threat to Farmland · via Daily Yonder

WHITE HOUSE John Fetterman Pushes Back Against Claims He’s A Lazy Senator, Bad Democrat · via HuffPost

WHITE HOUSE Survey: Floridians sour on prospects for the property insurance market · via Florida Phoenix

WORLD Illinois passed the nation’s first climate migration law. The effort has languished since. · via Grist

WHITE HOUSE The signs offer quick cash for homes. But states want more oversight. · via Stateline

WORLD Putin relying on massive long-range strikes to force Ukraine to surrender by 2027 — ISW · via NV

CULTURE Everyone Who Won Big At The 2026 VMAs: The Complete List · via HuffPost

WORLD Singapore’s plan to merge several islands could wipe out coral reefs · via Mongabay

WORLD Russian forces launch 165 drones in overnight attack against Ukraine · via NV

WORLD After Trump opened Bears Ears land to business, prospectors swooped in · via Grist

WORLD Russian strike on apartment building in Kharkiv, Ukraine, injures 25 people, including nine children, regional governor says · via Meduza

WORLD John D. Rockefeller Is a Cautionary Tale for Today’s Business Titans · via Foreign Policy

WORLD EU to give Ukraine and three other countries step-by-step accession plans with clear dates · via NV

WHITE HOUSE ‘So Pissed’: 77-Year-Old Conservative Caller Says Trump May Push Her To A Historic First · via HuffPost

WHITE HOUSE Natalie Harp mocked for Trump devotion on SNL, Jimmy Kimmel · via Newsweek

WORLD Undiscovered Amazon drugs could be valued at $215 billion, analysis finds · via Mongabay

WORLD Russia suspends planned inspections for one year at businesses hit by Ukrainian drone attacks · via Meduza

WORLD Trump says "we got them" after suspected terror plot foiled at UK airbase · via Newsweek

WORLD After five years of war, how do Ukrainian small businesses survive? · via Global Voices

CULTURE If You *Hate* Wasting Money, Here Are 40 Things Worth Your Purchase · via HuffPost

CULTURE Irritable Male Syndrome (IMS) Is An Actual Condition — And It Could Explain A Lot · via HuffPost

CULTURE Are You Being 'Spoofed'? This Specific Type Of Scam Is Hard To Catch. · via HuffPost

CULTURE If You Notice This Happening When You Drink Alcohol, It’s A Sign Your Body Is Aging · via HuffPost

CULTURE The 1 Big Mistake You Should Never, Ever Make With Your Passport · via HuffPost

TARIFFS NFL Week 3 Best Bets: TD Props For Jaxon Smith-Njigba, Derrick Henry · via Forbes

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